Republican Dumpster

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

In the News

Sorry for the long Delay. I am just sitting back and listening to Insannity and Holmes, with Bill Bennett. Nothing new here to report, unless you count the usual rhetoric of O'Really, Pat"Oh My God"Robertson, and Jerry"Show Me the Money"Falwell. So, I guess I will rant about some of this attack on christmas crap I see in the news.

First of all, if people are worried about Christians being under attack because of happy holidays, as some pundits claim, then the world is in trouble. This baseless claim creates a false dilema of sorts, by stating that if someone does not say merry christmas, they are somehow going to sacrifice your childeren and take away your bible and your way of life. You moronic right wing idiots, is your life really this bankrupt or what. How does this in anyway seem to take away baby jesus and assert that the christian way of life is under attack. You pathetic worms have succeded in turning our country into a bunch of bigots, hell bent on removing anything that does not conform to your religious standards.

Another thing to ponder about, when your at home and only the cat is in the room with you. You are arguing that some people are not saying something to you that you would like to hear, well, I have some news for you, these people could possibly want to tell you more than merry christmas. They could tell you to shove that ego of yours up your right wing card toting ass, and dont not forget to say happy new year. This makes me sick, you people have nothing better to report, how about kids being molested, drunk drivers killing families, or better yet, how about reporting on something other than contrived social ills.

These claims, although good for the ego, can sometimes get out of hand and cause all sorts of economic problems. Lets take a look shall we. The worst news I have read came in the form of a story that reported that some of the megachruches in Florida, you know the ones I am talking about, actually had to close their doors because of lack of attendance, i.e... no one to put money in the pot. I believe walmart and others decided to have a clearance sale on bibles and condoms, maybe that was the reason.

Friday, December 09, 2005

News From The Gospel

It's back and it's meaner than ever. You good people know what I am refering to; the challenge made by Jon Stewart, host of the Daily Show. Well, I think this should be quiet interesting and has the potential to be just as good as Roe v Wade, without all the legal misgivings. I certainly hope that Bill O'Really answers in the affirmative on this one. We will now look at the Tale of the Tape.

Bill O'Really:
-Host of the O'Really Factor and Really Radio Factor 10 years
-Has had some very good segments about the "Attack on Christmas"
-Has offered no viable or reliable studies to back up said assertions about the removal of "Baby Jesus" from stores, only his thoughts.
-Very dangerous jab, usually from the rear and has been known to use a loofa pad on occasion.
-Clouds the air with incoherant remarks that seem to stun guests into submission
-6'4 and lanky
-215 lbs
-Last fight, KO'd by Howard Stern on the factor and told to "sit back before I slap the piss out of you."

Jon Stewart:
-Host of the Daily Show 2 years
-Has some very interesting segments about politics and current events.
-Has had Bill O'Really as a guest on his show to plug one of his books.
-Very dangerous left hook, usually after falling star has been dazed by truth.
-200 lbs
-Last fight, split decision with Bill O'Really as guest.

Lets go down to ring side with our guest commentators, Chris B. and Al F.

Chris: This should be an interesting battle between one falling star and his replacement, how do you see it Al.

Al: Well Chris, I think you are correct about the falling, I am not sure about the star though. Bill has the reach advantage and that jab is sensational when used from behind. I expect to see Jon hold his own against this aging fighter from the right side of Philly.

Chris: Al, I think Jon will win this, it seems to me that he has truth on his side tonight, not to mention all the fans. He also has displayed that fearsome left hook on occasion and it can be deadly to foes. He is younger and quicker to the punch than the more experienced O'Really and will not have to rely on the loofa Al.

Al: You said something interesting Chris, the loofa has been an important tool in the arsenal of Bill since the Carribean fight in 2004. Bill seems to know exactly when to pull it out and get busy with it. This will be a close one Chris, and I think you are correct, Jon will pull it out in less than 6 rds.

Chris: Lets go inside the ring for the introductions and instruction by the referee.

Announcer Tom: In the blue corner, weighing in at 215 lbs, from the mean streets of Philly, with a professional record of 122-5, with only 5 fights coming by way of KO, he is the King of the Loofa, Billllll O'Realllllllly.

In the red corner, weighing in at 200 lbs, from the subtle suburb of Chicago, with a professional record of 55-0, with only 32 fights coming by way of the KO, he is the King of Political Comedy, give it up for, Jon Stewrrrrrrrt.

The referee for this bout is Judge Joe Brown

Fighters, when I tell you to back away, do it.
If I tell you to go to your corner, do it. There will be no low blows or slander, nor will any bullshit be tolerated, only facts that can be backed up. Each of you will have the opportunity to speak without the other butting in, and there will be no incoherant ramblings. Got It. Now, go to your corner and come out fighting, also, Bill, no unauthorized use of the loofa pad.

Bell: Rd.1

Bill comes out with the usual "you people on the left hate Christians and the Christmas Holidays"
Jon blocks the punch with a fearsome, "Bill, you just said holidays" and then shows the replay.
Jon fires a "show me the evidence that people on the left hate Christians and Christmas"
Bill is back pedaling, he seems to be rambling, Judge Joe breaks it up and takes a point away from Bill.
Jon pounces on the opportunity, "Bill, back up your claim that people on the left hate Christians"
Bill blocks the punch and fires an angry jab, "I think you are all just a bunch of Nazis"
Jon counters with a left hook, "No, the Nazis killed innocent Jews, gays, and anyone that did not fit into their plan, Bill"
Bill is reeling, he cant respond, Judge Joe, is counting, will this be it, it cant be over this quick, 8,9,10, your out.

Al: Chris, its over, I did not think it would have happened this soon and in this fashion.
Chris: It just goes to show you Al, you can run your mouth for so long and tell half truths and mislead, misspeak, and the like. But it will catch up with you.

Thanks for watching the historical event, see you Saturday when Pat"Oh My God" Robertson, squares off against Richard"Evolution"Dawkins in what is shaping up to be a one sided battle that puts the belly pulpit right in the middle of hell.

Thursday, December 08, 2005

On Politics and Religion

Hello There,

It is time once again to follow-up on the latest news of the wonderful and enlightening world of politics and religion. We will look at everything from the percieved state of Christianity, the attack on Christmas, the fall of Terminator Tom DeLay, and my personal favorite, Day 3 of Pat and Jerry: How they came to be.

Well, lets start by addressing the percieved state of the christian faith, as expressed by its followers or those that use it only when necessary. Rule 1: If you are going to quote the bible, please do not just quote what will support your positon. This gives educated people the appearance that you rely on specifc passages only, I liken it to conducting an experitment in flourine chemistry, but without any specifc model to base your findings. Religious "experts" have used this method to decieve many "lazy" people that would not normally take the time necessary to read all the material into believing their position is grounded in moral truth; aka; wolf in a sheepskin.
Rule 2: Do not ignore the warning signs given by the false prophets, i.e.. not allowing others to state or show their support against or for,said agenda or proposition, although I suspect the latter has no problem getting air time, just listen to Bill O'Really or Sean Insanity for this. People that view these types of programs or listen to this type of person will find themselves agreeing with them most of the time on any number of issues, no matter if they are for or against it.
Rule 3: I would suspect that this rule will apply to most of us who purchase books, but here goes. Have you ever stopped and noticed that most of the books that are #1 on the NYT usually have something to do with politics, either one way or another. Most are titled with something that helps instruct the reader about their position and what they can do to help, i.e. buying said books. Take a look at Whos Looking Out for You, Let Freedom Ring, How to talk to a Liberal and my personal favorite, Lies and the Lying Liars That Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right. Although to its credit, Al Franken's book was thourghly referenced checked and was quiet a read. The others fall short of being good books by many educated professionals standards, even literature professors I know thought these books fell way below the standards of good reading material, instead, they placed them in the category of hate, poorly researched, (try following up of Sean Hannitys book for this one), and half truths, no matter what these professors political make up was. This leads me to believe that most of these #1 books are just pandering to those of us that fall below a certain income line anyway, which is certainly the case with Bill O'Reilly, who claims to be as hard working as you and me. This illustrates a very fine point which I will attempt to drive home with some of you; your responses to this kind of material as soon as it hits the shelves is "clik whirr," meaning that it is automatica. You will just buy it because it supports you position, some of you will even attempt to get your talking points from it because you cannot do the research yourselves.

Attacking Christmas:
Rule 1: If you are going to make a bold statement and take a stand like the one Bill O'Really and Jerry Falwell have, you better be able to back it up. I am bulletproff on this one it was once said; Christmas does come from the Pagans in the form of the Winter Solstice festival that happened every year on when, December 25. All most people need to do is go to the library and check this out. This Christian religion is not what it seems, but dont tell the likes of Bill, Pat, and Jerry. They still believe that the book is correct and that it was written by God himself. The book was written by men, edited by Constatine II (whom himself was a Pagan) and placed into production by the Catholic church. Constatine was a Roman pagan, as was 99.9 % of Romans in that era, although his army was mainly christian. In order to get them to fight for a pagan leader, Constatine had to convince them he had a revelation, and boy did he, it worked.

Rule 2: If you are going to advocate the practical boycott of Wal-Mart, KMart, and the likes, you better be a reformed shopper. Listen to Bill O'Reallys comments on Tuesday and Wed. about people that shop at these fine stores. It does not mirror his "I am just a hard working man, like you" motiff. By the way, the only people that shop at these stores for Pat, Bill, and Sean are their maids, you know, those highly paid and skilled professionals that put up with this type of bull. Why havent Bill and Sean been breaking the Presidents balls of the proposed immigration reforms lately, oh, it must have something to do with pay and benefits.

Rule 3: If you are going to say Happy Holidays, please, for the love of God, say it with a convincing smile, at least try to act like your happy about it. I do not find this politically incorrect or in any way vulgar. This has been taken seriously by only the few elite that have the means to get it heard anyway. How does this offend them you might ask, well, they feel it deprives them of their presents, usually in the form of control. Also, if there is one or more holliday falling in the same time frame, why not say happy hollidays, it is easier of course. I know, lets just say, Hail Great Wise One or Two and be done with it. This is funny if you think about it, this happened last year and the year before, but as usual, it died down after old Bill, Pat, and Jerry got their fill of food, fun, hookers, and presents and then they moved on to bigger and better things, like evolution, funny, they cannot even be credible on that either.

Terminator Tom DeLay:

Rule 1: If only paper money and coins constitutes currency and not check, then I need to cash my checks in. I will galdly write them for any amount and not repay, nope never, you cant make me, Toms lawyer will be hired if you try. This is just plain, pull it out your ass funny; I have heard alot of things in my time, like the guy to told me the dollar was only worth 37 cents, he backed out of letting me purchase his savings for that rate. This ranks up there with Bill Frist making a doctoral diagnosis from the floor of the legislature. Wow, and who said politicans were stupid and could bore the hell out of the common person. First Tom, you went on the air, FOX News of course, and told the good veiwers that you were in fact corrupt and had been the target of various allegations. This does not look good for you, better call in the favors from your alter ego, HotTub Tom for help.

Rule 2: You might seem more credible if you wore better clothing, like a Aerosmith T-Shirt and some ripped jeans, and to top it off, a pair of Birkenstocks, we know you love the environment. Also, stop calling every judge in the Great state of Texas, I have no idea why you guys from Texas call it that, politically motivated. Pretty soon you will run yourself out of Texas judges and straight into Alabama, remember old Roy. We know what you are trying to pull here, the old "everyone is out to get me" crap, hey Tom, that worked when we were in grade school, your supposed to be an adult, and as such, you for one should know how to take responsibility for your own actions. Stop blaming others, we already know most them are singing like the church chour you attend, it is just a matter of time. You have brouth disgrace to the office and not only do the American people know it, most of your former allies in Washington know it too.

Rule 3: A known varible in public relations: Never state that you have "No Comment". This just tells people that something shady has happened and that you are just in need of a time out to think of a good lie to cover it up. It is noteworthy of you to point out that this is politically motivated, partisian politics, and yadda, yadda, yadda. You just dont get it do you Tom, you are not as powerful as you think, it has been said "keep your friends close, your enemies closer" better start looking around Tom. On the other hand, I have to kuddos for being smart, but not being intelligent on this subject.

Time for Day 3: Pat and Jerry: How They Came to Be

Back at Gospel Gulch, Pat and Jerry have just discovered that Jim Baker is falling from grace.

Pat: Jerry, do you think that Tammy Fae will be free once Jim is in prison. I think we can use her in our organization, I always wanted my face made up for tv. (That water slide looks fun, I wonder if I could slide down it naked) ha..ha...ha

Jerry: Pat, did you just say naked and slide.

Pat: Jerry, I was thinking out loud, that is how all my grrreat ideas come to me. Sometimes, Jerry, when Im at home alone in the dark, I think about gay people and all the things I want to do to them. Jerry, um...did I tell you of my great hate for gays...

Jerry: Pat, you do need some form of help, I think you should call our prayer line. Now, we have purchased our tv station, I think we need to be flown to Alabama for a old time gospel televival Pat. Most of those people are bow legged and ignorant anyway, lets take their money Pat. What do you think.

Pat: That sounds good to me, who is going to fly us there anyway Jerry. All we can afford currently is an ultralite plane and I do not think it can hold the both of us.

Jerry: Pat, you imbecil, you have already mentioned Tammy Fae. Lets twist Jims hand into loaning us the PTL jet and other needed equipment. He will believe that we are going to speak out against his being arrested for various crimes and he will cave into our every demand.

Pat: Good idea Jerry, I need to stop for a pee break, the 28 weight loss shakes are kicking my fat butt, not to mention my worn out bladder and poorly functioning liver, and man Jerry, this stuff reeks havoc on your intestinal tract if you know what I mean.

Tune in later for Day 4: Pat and Jerry: How They Came to Be

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Tom DeLay and Others

Hello again,

I decided to take a break from writing my sitcom about old Pat and Jerry and wanted to focus on the world of corruption. Specifically, Tom DeLay and those that might be going down the same path of enlightenment, "in the biblical sense" since Terminator Tom believes in "God" and his teachings. I will also touch on Al Franken, a wonderful author and I might add, great researcher of political misgivings. I will add my comments to help "elevate the discourse" in red where "I" feel appropriate.

On Terminator Tom:

He states that the current charges leveled against him are politically motivated.
T.T., get over it, you have systematically proven time and time again that you are motivated politically to "Hammer" anyone that gets in your way.

He also states that these charges should be dismissed because they are reprehensible, unjust, and plain old unfounded.
Again T.T., get over it, if this is the case, then the presiding judge would have dismissed them. As for the charges being reprehensible, unjust, and plain old wrong, I seriously doubt that this is the case. The word reprehensible seems to be floating around the Rep. vernacular lately, with VP Cheney using that word at least 37 times to describe Representative Murtha's comments and also to pass it off as partisian politics.

"The time has come that the American people know exactly what their Representatives are doing here in Washington. Are they feeding at the public trough, taking lobbyist-paid vacations, getting wined and dined by special interest groups? Or are they working hard to represent their constituents? The people, the American people, have a right to know...I say the best disinfectant is full disclosure, not isolation." - U.S. Rep. Tom DeLay, 11/16/95

Well, the statement above should just about do it for old T.T. In closing this discussion, I would like to say that it is time for voters to wake up, while we work at sometimes boring jobs, our elected representatives are just taking the money and running. This is not new, nor is it an acceptable way to execute the offices in which these politicans hold, time for some true accountability.

Time for my daily rant about old Pat Robertson, nothing new, but I will add Day 3 on Wed.

I wanted to discuss the old elephant in the corner issue, intelligent design according to Pat and the theory of evolution. There is a great satirical segment by Al Franken in one of his CDs that I just picked up, I implore you to listen to it, it is great.

Pat feels that only the bible can give an accurate account for the creation of all life on Earth, he specifically quotes Genesis. The premiss here is that he believes it is some form of science and therefore should be taught in school science classes. Nothing could be further from the truth. ID is based on the biblical teachings and is not science and no, there have not been any discoveries that support any of the claims otherwise. Of course, there are a few books that attempt to use science, but they have been discredited, usually from the minute they hit the shelves, I suggest some people pick them up and read them.

I have a strong faith in the biblical teachings and having said that, I have not discovered anywhere in the bible that it directs me to go to any church and listen to a prophet minister the word of God to me and my family. The bible to state that he whomever shall read these words shall believe, or something similar.

These Pats of the world have truely lost there faith and replaced it with hate and intolerance of others. Faith, blind faith can lead to serious consequences if taken wrongly, which is normally the case with false prophets. I have often wondered if the viewers of these TV shows have asked themselves an important question: "Why is old Pat always asking me for money," and more importantly, "Why do I always give it." Has anyone been able to connect the dots with this one, Pats Miracle Loss Shake, it seems to me that is correlates with the current diet trends that have been sweeping across the nation.

Please do not misunderstand me, I think that faith and religion plays an important role in society today. It should not be used as a wedge item by religious zealots to help push their agenda. Look back historically and you will notice that religious zealots with an agenda have created more death than life, and have also increased their own wealth.

In the words of Dan Brown: History is written by the winners, specifically, the winners that were able to conquer and survive.


Monday, December 05, 2005

Pat Robertson and Homosexual Parents

Hello Again,

I decided to add a new post that addressed the issue of homosexual parents and their parenting skills. I am married and have a wonderful wife and son, that being said; why can't the religious right and others move on with this issue. The only reason I believe it is an issue, is because they have made it an issue and have the "moral" authority to push it. I went to old Pats website and searched some of his "Bring It On" questions and found some inspirational advice about this controversial subject: Here is the Question....

My friend has two homosexual fathers as parents. They adopted him when he was a toddler, and now he’s 13 years old. I’ve been taking him to church lately, and he is really started to rethink everything they taught him. Is it wrong for him to confront them about their lifestyle? If they forbid him to go to church, what should he do?
Pat Robertson
It’s wrong for homosexuals to adopt. I think that they will lead children into the lifestyle they have. If you really care for somebody and you’re close to somebody, the biggest thing you can do to help them is to talk to them about the Lord and to share the Bible, not confrontational, but share the Bible. Whether or not these two hardened homosexuals would come out of that lifestyle remains to be seen. But at least the young man needs to get established in the things of God. And if you’re successful at that, God bless you. But as far as him going back to his, quote, 'two fathers' and confronting them, I don’t know. What do you think?
Terry Meeuswen
Well, I don’t think he should. There’s that saying, you hear it all the time. I’m probably not quoting it exact, but, 'Preach the Gospel at all times. Use words if you must.' I think even as a 13-year-old, through being diligent in the Word of God, attending church with you, speaking lovingly to the two people who’ve been put in a position of authority in parenting over him, that he can be have more influence by not saying something and loving Jesus and letting God control his life that confronting them.
Pat Robertson
The biggest thing, though, is that they will try to get him into that lifestyle and that is the danger. Of course, I don’t know them. I mean, maybe that wouldn’t be the case, but I suspect it will be. And so the big thing is for this young man to get himself established in the Lord rather than confronting.

My Biased Comments:
1) The biggest thing is that they will try to get him into that lifestyle and that is the danger.
The real answer I think that Pat should have addressed was not the parents trying to get this kid into this lifestyle. They have allowed this kid to attend a church that probably knows his parents. He states that the parents will try to get him into that lifestyle; he already lives it on a daily basis and still attends church, apparently with no known issues, except for the fact that a "Christian Friend" has decided to ask Pat for advice about what to do. Chris Advice: Tell said friend to get the hell out of my life and business and stop corrupting this persons personal life. By the way, does this "Christian Friend" have homophobia himself, which begs another question; why did he postulate that said person has now started to rethink his position. To put it another way, there seems to be a hidden agenda by this "Christian Friend" because he has started to take this person to church and has been talking to him about God and why, "here is the key," it is wrong for him to live in this type of environment. I am a social scientist and have never seen any valid research that homosexual parents push their lifestyle on their kids. This seems to me as though a religious zealot has decided to brain wash this kid with his personal belief systems and turn him against his parents. Why to go; update on the score folks: God 1 Gay Parents 0.

2) Pat believes or suspects that the parents will attempt to push the Gay way of life on their child. News Flash: Pat Robertson has just been made an honorary member of the US Secret Service...Gay Vice Squad. He suspects, that is like saying Pat only pockets 99 percent of the money generated by CBN and their other holdings...although we have reliable estimates that is only 90 percent and he usually drives nice cars and lear jets. Stop using that "suspect" word Pat, it makes you look, well, suspect to most people with common sense, unless you are a regular viewer or caller to the Pay for a Prayer line. New Score folks: God 1 Gay Parents 1.

3) I have a gay family member and there have been many times he has came up to me and said I looked like I needed to be gay, well, he never really said that, but you good readers get the point I am making. It is outlandish for people to postulate that gay people can use the powers of subbersion and mind twisting to get others to be gay. It has been researched over and over in social science and 90 percent of the literature comes to the same conclusion; being homosexual is not a choice, nor do most homosexual people raise their kids to be homosexual. This has been invented by religious zealots and others, under the premise of raising awarness of the threat, more of less, raising their personal bank accounts. Wake up people, when will you learn an important fact of life, that people choose to associate with those they feel most comfortable with and those that share some of the same beliefs they do. Most of us Americans are not threatened by homosexuals on a daily basis, what has happened is that "Sexual Predators," the real issue is only getting less air time, google it and find out for yourselves. We have overlooked an important fundemental problem, we have let a few people decide "OUR" agenda and how it will play out. Score: God 1 Gay Parents 2

When we last left old Pat and Jerry, they were contemplating how to set up a multimillion dollar business to help minister to this great nation.

Day 2:

(Pat arrives in his new Cadillac)

Pat: Jerry, I have given great thought to what we have spoke about and believe we can make it happen.

Jerry: Good Pat, I have set up a secret meeting with my "friends" to help us get started. We must first define what our agenda will be and how we will push it to the american people. New research indicates that seniors are the most gullable segment of the population, along with 10-12 year olds. If this is correct, and I believe GOD says it is, this is where we must start.

Pat: Jerry, I talked to Oral Roberts...funny that GOD would call upon someone named Oral, but anyway, I spoke to him about his big showing with the tower scene he put on in Texas or where ever it was, and he said our plan seems fine. He did note, that if we push too hard, we might find ourselves burnt at the stake...funny, I thought me and you were the only ones permitted by GOD to burn people at the stake.

Jerry: Good...ha...ha...ha.. We shall start out today, lets get going. We can take my, now that I think about it, we would look much better arriving in a new caddy.

Pat: Jerry, you got 5 bucks, you know, to help pay for gas. No, Jerry, you can not borrower the money from me....well, can I trust you..are you good for it.

(Arriving at the Godly Sitting)

Jerry: Ladies and gentlemen, this is none other that the great prophet, Pat Robertson, my cohort...I mean business partner. Lets get to it... Joan O'A, where are we on the TV company purchase?

Joan O'A: Jerry, all is going to plan, we have decided to aquire...overtake a small tv company in Florida, located adjacent to a senior center...ha...ha. Also, Jerry, did you know that senior communities have great swimming pools and movie stars..

Jerry: No, I did not know that, who cares, we are birdwalking here folks. We need to focus on the tv programs that we will be offering...

Pat: Speaking of offering Jerry, I have just had another revelation: God spoke to me while I was sleeping and said: Pat, if you make outlandish and unfounded comments, just state that you mis-spoke...and also to come up with a "Miracle Weight Loss Shake," to sell to the masses..

Adam: Funny that you mention that Pat, I do not think people will by this shake if you, youself have not lost any weight...Just my thoughts Pat..

Pat: Nobody asked you Adam, anyway, it is not about me, Adam, it is about what the people hear, not see, that will make them buy. Just check the bible, there are many places where people bought or used things they did not that big boat for the flood, we all know that all they needed was a tall wall on the high ground...or...the many trumpets to destroy that wall, all they really needed was a couple of bulldozers. would think that people would actually read the bible and draw the same conclusions.

Tune in Tuesday for the next installment of: Pat and Jerry: How They Came to Be

How to set up your own Dial a Prayer Line

Step 1: Get Phone
Step 2: Plug it in
Step 3: Place cheap tv add, "God wants you to call him for help"
Step 4: When phone rings, answer it.
Step 5: Keep pencil and pad handy, it is good for credit card numbers or just remembering your address. You know, for checks.
Step 6: Hope you do not get caught cheating on you taxes.

Sunday, December 04, 2005

Lets Get Started

I have created this blog in order to find others that share my view, that is, a common view of the way the US is now, not the way others think it should be; with us common people just living in it and going along with the flow. I finally reached a point in my life where I am frustrated with both sides of the political spectrum. Neither can get us where we need to be and they surely have no clue about how we really live day to day. In the words of Noam C... Americans get their news in 30 minute segments... I would like to start today' post off with the religious zealots that have decided, for better of worse, that they speak for me and you and also like to spend some of our money, for those of you that are dupped into giving to the likes of Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell, etc...etc..

So, where is this direct line to "GOD" that they claim to have; along with divine powers of healing and telling of the future. Accordingly, I think that this "GOD" line has been cut off by none other than...well, you know who, for failure to pay. When has Pat Robertson ever been correct in his assumptions that all the bad in the world today has been in response to gays, liberals, bigots, and others he has a dislike and disdain for. He has advocated the murder of Hugo Chavez and the speedy death of a Chief Justice of the US Supreme Court, not to mention various other calls for natural disasters to cleanse the infidel from the US. Lets allow for others to call me mad, crazy, and plain wrong about old Pat.

Now I have always wondered why the bible is being used by filthy and unclean false prophets. I believe, with no quantifiable evidence mind you, that Pat and Jerry are using the bible to line their pockets with your money. But, it has been said before: Who am I to stop a fool that wants to part with their money... or something to that effect... or There is a fool born every minute, roughly about 1.3 million of you. I had no idea that "GOD" wanted 20.00 to 40.00 per person for a good old healing prayer that would help you out in your time of need. What some of you people need is to be hit in the head with a tack hammer because you are stupid...that is right, I said STUPID, not ignorant, that would imply that you know better and clearly, you do not. Some of my fellow Americans sit in front of their tv and suck up all that old Pat and Jerry have to say about life, gays, and other assorted people that they hate. You should read the bible for yourselves and stop just reading the specific passages old Pat and Jerry quote...hear is one for you and do not ask me to give it to you, that would be to easy, turn off your tv, blow the dust off the black book, and open it up for yourselves, find and read this; "It is much easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than it is for a rich man to enter the gates of heaven." I am not concerned about their religious agenda, clearly with the forth comming investigations into corruption in the Republican era, there will not be much of an agenda for them to push on working Americans. I am concerned with the countless people that actually listen to them and then think,"They are correct about America, our way of life, and more specifically, my way of life and I believe I will give them my money and vote." Funny thing happens on the way to the primary, you finally start to think for yourself, but your inner circle has already formed your "voting agenda" for you and now it is too late to turn around.

Next, I would like to consider the other side of this well constructed biased argument. That old Pat and Jerry; (I thought of a business concept that is related to Ben and Jerrys....but more on that later), are just doing "GODS" work of healing, helping the poor and down troden, and converting the infidel gays and hate mongers. This side of the argument is not well constructed, but is biased.
It starts off on Day 1:
Pat and Jerry: Lets get together and minister to the helpless of this great nation.
Pat: Well, Jerry, you know that this is going to take alot of committment and hard work, not to mention money. I do not know if we can pull off such an enormous undertaking.
Jerry: I believe that "GOD" has given us a calling, and to that effect, we must go out and start ourselves a large flock in small rural areas and then we can begin to grow. It is simple economics Pat, if we invest in a fledgeling TV company, it will grow from there.
Pat: Jerry, I have just had a revelation, "GOD" spoke to me and said: Go unto the masses and convert, subvert, misinform and disinform all the good hard working people, also, if you build it they will come. I believe that this is a direct reference to "money" Jerry, and I....I mean, we, will need plenty of money for this project. Jerry, did I ever tell you I hate gay people, I also see them on a daily, Jerry, do you see them too.
Jerry: Pat, your getting off the core issue, money, um, I mean ministering to the american people. I have a good plan to help raise the needed money for our campaign, I call it the Sell A Prayer, modeled after the Telethon. The way I see it Pat, if we sell prayers for 20 to 40 dollars per person, we can, in time get rich. Hey, are you paying attention to me Pat...
Pat: Yeah, yeah, I'm listening to you...I just saw another gay person.

Tune in on Monday for: Tips on how to set up your very own, "Dial a Prayer Line" and Day 2 of "In the Beginning: How Pat and Jerry Came to Be"

Thanks: theengineer